I once had a chat with my parents about something very small that happened between them and someone else. They were put in a bad light by some gossip.I know many people will retaliate after hearing what someone else had said about them,but my parents didn’t. They just moved away from the relationship. I then asked my mom when was the moment she knew that she must step away from this particular relationship.It has happened numerous times before where they were badly treated by the same person.She answered : “The moment I realised that I am not treated with respect, I stepped away.”


A strange word that many tries to define but struggle to communicate the meaning. How do you measure it? How do you determine who to respect and who not to?

I am the same way than my parents. I am a proud person and I say this with pride. It took me 12 years to come to a place where I absolutely adore myself and my life choices. I am proud of who I am and what I have accomplished.

Because I respect myself, I automatically respect others. If something like respect becomes a value in your life, you treat others with respect. Why? Because your values are your lenses you use to look at the world.

The other day Stoffel told me stories of how people really go out to ruin their “competition”. I looked at him and just couldn’t imagine how that can be possible. How can anyone want to destroy someone else?

My answer was obvious, that person has no respect for himself. That is why it is easy to bring destruction to the world around him without a second thought.

In the last couple of weeks I was in different kinds of situations where respect was exchanged for selfishness. I was also unfortunately there to see the fruit of that selfish and insecure decision. We think we are powerful and proud when we breathe threats and spread gossip stories just to teach “them” a lesson. We think we showcase power when we fight with our gloves off.


It is disrespectful. And it exposes our own value system.

My career as a photographer has been left by many others because it is too cut throat. I am situated in Hermanus and not really in contact with many other photographers. One delightful day in February, one made her way into my “territory” and we became instant great friends. This morning I received an email from her thanking me for helping her grow and learning from me. I read it with tears in my eyes because I felt exactly the same about her. Ilze has challenged me in so many ways and it always came out for the good.

One day a service provider that we both use, asked her why we don’t hate each other. As if it has become the norm to compare and “trash” the other one. She was taken aback by the question and then started to explain how we cover each other and how both our businesses started to explode since we became friends. This is a relationship that is based on mutual respect. I have tremendous respect for her as a person and definitely for her skill. I feel honoured that I can tap into that crazy scientific brain for help and guidance.

The same with my husband.

The other day I heard a bunch of girls speak about their husbands. Their words were filled with respect and honour of the husbands in their absence. And my heart rejoiced.Their lives testify of the power of their respect for their men.

Well done, girls.

I have huge respect for my man. I once asked him why did he choose to marry me? His answer was simply: “You were the first girl I respected enough to marry.”

Respect is something that has gone missing in recent years. We fight and protect ourselves rather than to treat each other with respect as Jesus has intended it. There are always more power in the way of the Kingdom than in the way of the world.

I want to try something else with this blog post.

Why not comment with how “respect” has touched your life recently? You can do it on Facebook or at the bottom of this post.

Have a great day!


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