It has been a very long time since I posted anything on here. So many reasons as to why, but just to keep you in the loop, I decided after 9 years of being an active Facebooker, to leave that platform. I opened an “alter ego” ,my dream girl persona, to manage my business pages , that is why you can read this on Farriah, but I closed my personal account and this morning I checked and saw that Facebook finally deleted my account. It took them two weeks.
So no more social Linda with the perfect life on Facebook.
This morning as I was driving to do some grocery shopping I looked around me. I have found what I was looking for: a real life intertwined with a living God. No more performance or a need to say my opinion in order to count.I became just me surrounded with real authentic life in the form of the ouma in front of me in my grocery line, the young man with his bakkie next to me in the parking lot and the mom with toddler in the stroller and dog on a leash that insists on pulling the opposite direction. I found my peaceful coastal town to be stimulating enough. I don’t miss Facebook at all. That says a lot since I was mrs Facebook active.
As a daughter of the One most High, I realised that my heart yearns for authentic relationships. I need to be heard and seen. That is what really meets my heart’s desire. Not the “Oh look at me and what I have reached” mentality that I slowly slipped into on Facebook. Since leaving Facebook I started to have time. Time to listen to my God and my husband, to chat to my incredible nanny, friends and family, and to watch my son grow. I treasure these moments dearly.
As I am typing this , I realised that I might have been an Facebook addict or more harshly said an validation addict. I wanted people to notice me, my opinions and my life. The thing is, it got so big that with the praise came the criticism as well.. and since I was sharing pearls, I started to feel pressure to be perfect. Comparison set in and the “what if that person says this” fear started to rule my life. Together with all the negative news about this country, my day was filled with gloom all because of what I saw on Facebook. Too many people had access to my life who wasn’t suppose to be there and I gave them that access.
So I stopped, walked away and am on this new journey of absolute delight and freedom.
Enjoy your day.